Color Struck .

SO, the other day i was at my sisters house
watching TYRA. there were black girls going back and
forth about what they go through as black women.
one darker skinned woman was just
bashing the lighter skinned woman saying
that she has it so much easier just
because "she's closer to being white."

my initial reaction was whoa, how primitive... then i got to thinking.

How often have you heard a black girl say, "oh I'm mixed with ______."

How often have you heard a black girl say, "my hair used to be long until ________."

How many times have you uttered the words, "oh she's pretty for a dark girl"

How many times have you seen a darker girl with long hair and thought "that has to be a weave."

How many times have you heard, "light skin niggas are out of style"

-lmao, I'm getting off my point here.. but what im getting at
is that an African American is quick to call someone out as being
racist but in my opinion the racism exist in
our own culture more than anything.
like most girls would prefer a little wavey light skin
boy that's more trouble than hes worth
over a dark boy who's doing something with his life.
Ive heard guys say "0h shes light skin? she must be bomb."

i don't know, now I'm just babbling and i probably sound really ignorant lol,
but this has been on my brain tough for a few days now.
I'm sad to say it's even alive in my own family.
my great-great grandmother [a black woman]
chose to have children with a white french man because she didn't want
a house full of [from her own mouth] "picka ninny- crumb snatching- porch monkeys."
my grandfather [who's father was only a toddler when slavery was abolished]
was a darker skinned man. i never met him but from the stories i've heard,
he married my grandmother partly because
of her light skin and wouldn't even so much as touch
chocolate just because of its color.

have you ever heard of the paper bag test?
my mom was telling me that someone in my family used to
do that back in the day. Imagine dating
someone you really like, only to bring them
home to meet your family and have them not approve
because that person is darker than a paper bag.

My sister was telling me about this book she read that was pretty
much about slavery and what not. it said that the lighter
and more attractive slaves were put indoors to pretty much
be servants while the dark and less attractive slaves were made to
do the hard labor in the fields. according to the book,
splitting the race in half would be a way to control them forever.
have you ever read The Autobiography of Malcolm X... i found it interesting that his
father treated him better than he did the other children just
because Malcolm was the lightest. I'm the first person to advocate that we should let
go of slavery and just move on and don't make excuses for things.... but even in
today's society that concept is very much alive.

lol, the funny part to me is that other races don't even identify us
as being "dark skin", "brown skin", "light skin" ... or whatever else
when they look at us the just see BLACK.. whether it be man or woman.
those are barriers and boxes that we've placed ourselves in.

"my eyes despise you for who i am" -ellie.